Life Tips On Romantic Relationships in Recovery
Learning life tips for sobriety can help you learn how to live and do the right thing to maintain a sober lifestyle, comfortably. When a person becomes sober and opens their world to a life of recovery, it opens up a world of possibility and opportunity. It is the chance for the person to start rebuilding their life and to regain the things that they have lost, and more! Us addicts like instant gratification and to fill voids to feel better, which is a blessing and a curse at times. Romantic relationships, especially in early recovery, can be an awesome source of happiness and gratification, but they can also be a great source of pain and destruction. One of the worst mistakes a person in early recovery can do is jump into a relationship headfirst, especially when they’re newly clean/sober. If you’ve ever been in treatment before, you’ve heard people say to stay away from relationships for at least one year in recovery, and it is strongly advised to remain focused on yourself and your sobriety. Essentially, you’ve got to learn to love yourself and be okay with yourself in your new life before you can even begin to consider sharing yourself and your heart with someone else. Here are a few life tips on being happy in recovery without having to fill a void by getting into a relationship.
Life Tips: The Importance of Avoiding Romantic Relationships in Early Recovery
When you decide to join a life of recovery and stay sober from all mood and mind altering substances, staying sober needs to be your first priority. The first few months of one’s recovery is crucial, and are often described as an emotional roller coaster; this is because there is so much going on and there are so many different emotions involved in your new found life. You just lost your best friend (drugs or alcohol) and you’re finding ways to cope with living without it. The last thing you need is to add the stress of a new relationship (or breakup) into the mix. In early sobriety, it’s normal to feel lonely and like everything sucks, but filling voids is just like replacing the drugs and alcohol for something else; it’s like switching one addiction for another. It’s suggested that you wait one year into your recovery, or AT LEAST until you finish working the twelve steps; because then, you’ll know about yourself and be aware of yourself. The whole point of the twelve steps is to learn about yourself, and how can you get into a relationship and share yourself with someone else if you have no idea who you are (think about it).
Life Tips: Rehab Romance
I’m sure you’ve all heard of rehab romances; it’s a thing. People get into treatment and they “fall in love” with someone in there. There’s also such thing as rehab goggles (trust me, I’ve had them). We are so vulnerable and scared that we latch onto the first thing that makes us feel good again. In recovery, I’ve learned that addiction is a three-part disease, and that the big emptiness (huge hole/ feeling that something was always missing) that I always felt, I always tried to fill it with drugs, alcohol, sex, relationships, money, shopping (anything I could to make myself feel whole, but nothing ever worked for long. So of course, we try to do so in early recovery because we just gave up drugs and alcohol.
Life Tips On Thirteenth Stepping
Just like rehab romances, thirteenth stepping is also a thing. It refers to a situation where an AA member who is experienced with sobriety and recovery begins a sexual or romantic relationship with a newcomer (someone who is in early recovery). This is often frowned upon, because the newly sober person is looked at as vulnerable, and the 13th stepper is looked at as the person who is preying on the newcomer. Sometimes, you can’t help who you have feelings for in life, but respecting a newcomer enough to let them find themselves first is the right thing to do (I’ve learned the hard way). Early recovery may already be stressful enough, so why add this stress to the mix?
Life Tips On Loving Yourself
Learning life tops on how to love yourself first, before loving another person is crucial and will help your recovery immensely. People who are in sobriety can find relationships to be their hardest challenge, especially in early recovery. Even a break up can cause a relapse, due to the newcomer not learning healthy ways to cope and to learn about themselves and how to stay sober. Sober people most definitely can find love and have relationships in recovery, we’re not saying you can’t ever, it is just strongly suggested that you do some work on yourself first.
If you or someone you know is struggling with addiction issues, call for help at (866) 323-6590 today.
