Dealing with heartbreak is never easy, nor comfortable, especially in recovery. The whole process of dealing with heartbreak brings up a lot of emotions and defects that we never want to cope with; such as insecurity, anger, anxiety, depression, guilt, confusion, etc. For many years, we spent so much time and money on numbing these feelings, but now we’ve got to actually find better ways for dealing with heartbreak in recovery. This is why it is so strongly suggested that you stay away from relationships within the first year of sobriety, because everyone’s program is different, and many people may not be prepared to cope with dealing with heartbreak so soon into their sobriety.

As seen in on of our previous articles, Life Tips On Relationships In Early Recovery, you’ll find reasons as to why it’s particularly not a good idea to do so; but yet, it still happens, and that’s still okay. There are also some articles for dealing with loneliness and how to deal with rejection. They all fall under a similar feeling: pain. So why is it that dealing with heartbreak is so painful?

The Science Of Dealing With Heartbreak

Who knew that there was actually science behind heartbreak?? Oddly enough, dealing with heartbreak causes real life physical effects on the body and the brain. When you’re dealing with physical pain, it affects the Anterior Cingulate Cortex in the brain, which is also the same part of the brain that is activated when you are feeling emotional pain (such as dealing with heartbreak or loss of a loved one). When it comes down to it, physical and emotional pain aren’t so different after all. Studies show that many human beings would rather be physically hurt than have to endure emotional or social pain. It turns out that Love is one of the basic things in life that human beings need for survival, along with food and water. There is also such thing as being addicted to love, who woulda thought? Well, it makes sense, and when people are dealing with heartbreak, it feels as if one of the things that made their life feel complete was ripped away from them.

Dealing with heartbreak is more than just an emotional defeat; the pain is very, very real. Many people who suffer from the disease of addiction tend to numb themselves, build walls to protect them, or hide in general so that we can’t get hurt (myself included). I’ve learned very recently that if I shut everyone out, I won’t allow myself to let anyone to love me at all. It’s so much easier for me to build these walls around myself so that I don’t have to be hurt by anyone (because NO ONE likes the feeling of being hurt). We’ve got one life to live, so why live this life hiding? We have got to take chances; yes, we are going to get hurt, but that’s where we learn from things and grow stronger from them!

Coping And Dealing With Heartbreak In Recovery

There are so many ways to cope when dealing with heartbreak that don’t involve abusing drugs and alcohol. Numbing ourselves and hiding is not the answer. Fun facts:

• Tylenol reduces emotion pain
• We can unfortunately relive (re-experience) heartbreak more vividly than we can with physical pain
• Heartbreak can create surges of aggression and anger
• Heartbreak can cause depression
• Heartbreak can cause us to destroy our own self-esteem
• Dealing with heartbreak can temporarily lower our IQ
• Heartbreak or social pain doesn’t respond to reason

So get out there, talk to friends or make some friends and get your mind off of things. Don’t sit home alone with Netflix and reflect on the “Why’s”. Learn from this experience and allow it to make you stronger in life. We’ve all gone through terrible things in life, one way or another, but yet, we’re still alive! Continue to be the best person you can be and do things to better yourself and your life.

If you or someone you know is struggling with drug or alcohol abuse, call for help today at (866) 323-6590.